Dodge Van for Sale!

Craigslist link

1995 Dodge Van Magnum Prime Time 149653 miles
- Leather Interior
-Everything runs great. (Shouldn't it be everything rolls great when talking about cars? Running is for suckers.)
-Seats 7: Bench in back holds 3, 2 captains chairs in middle, 2 front captains chairs. (Who is in charge with that many Captains?)
-New Tires from Costco (traction is very important)
-Bench in back folds down to a comfy bed with the push of a button. (It's not called the Shaggin' Waggin' for nothing.)
-Working TV and VCR. (Will include a well loved Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle VHS. You want this van now, I can tell)
-Has tow hitch to pull trailers, boats, beanie babies, whatever you need to tow. 
-Extra high roof (great for road trip dance parties)
-Removable bar in back that can be used to hang clothes from. (keep your pet bats comfortable anytime)
-Great for camping, road trips, temporary living. Guest room for family reunions, date night (when you have to leave the house to get away from the kids' loud noise but it would be illegal to leave the property. (Nothing says romance like popcorn and a VHS)
-All side and back windows have 2 curtains. Pull down shades and dark brown curtains for sleeping (or hiding when visiting the in-laws).
-Works perfectly for those who love to shop at yard sales or move furniture. Can fit anything you need on the spot (unless you are an Orca smuggler & shame on you if you are). 
Back door has a collectable Coca-Cola bottle opener that works on all bottle types! (Please drink responsibly.)
-Will include new snow chains, ipod to cassette converter, extra anti freeze, extra motor oil. (boogie down in the snow)

We had a fun time writing this add. Hopefully it will sell quickly.