Our Son is Gay and Trans Gender.
I am going to talk about it so you don't have to. Plus Family Pictures
Anyone who knows our oldest knows that he has never been the stereotypical boy, nor did I raise him to be such. I just wanted my kids to be who they are: to play, dress, and look the way they want to look. When we found out for sure there was an adjustment period. We ultimately didn't think anyone would be shocked, but we have been surprised at how many people are. I guess he has always just been himself around us and didn't really hide anything, but that hasn't always been the case with others.
Things I want people to know:
1. Chandler is still Chandler. His appearance may be different but inside he has not changed. The only thing that may have changed is your perception of him.
2. It does not matter what our belief system is or is not, we are going to love and support our son no matter what. This may seem like a no brainer but not everyone feels this way.
3. Have we always known? Yes and no. We always knew he was his own unique high heel wearing spirit but for us, anyway we still assumed he was straight until he told us otherwise. (I am curious if all parents assume their kids are straight)
4. The hardest part for me was transitioning my mindset for the future. From the time you hold a baby in your arms you picture him or her growing up, getting married, having babies--a "Normal Life." As much as we suspected, it was hard knowing that having Chandler’s long blond haired little daughters running around is probably not going to happen, and my long awaited girls weekends with my daughter-in-laws is dwindling in number. Yes I know there are a lot of “buts,” “what ifs,” etc., to theses statements. I am simply expressing what I needed to deal with myself.
5. Chandler feels more like a girl than a boy, so he dresses that way most of the time. He is comfortable this way and has had very little opposition to this at school.
You are always welcome to ask Eric and I any questions you may have. For now we want all of our kids to be able to feel happy and comfortable with who they are. This is a unique situation for all of our family members. We are still a family, happy at varying degrees just like any other family with two teenagers. Since Chandler is more comfortable as a girl we decided to allow him dress this way for our family pictures. These photos are supposed to represent our family and this was the best way to do that.
