Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Marriage

I have been seeing a lot of quotes about love and marriage lately. Many of which are extremely unrealistic. While we would love a night on shining armor to bring us roses every day and feed us caviar while we watch the sunset at the beach this simply is not going to happen. What women see as romantic or as a sign of affection is not always the way a man sees it. I hear women complain all the time that their husband does not do romantic things or is somehow not living up to there fantasy. My 17th wedding anniversary is coming up soon so here is some of what I have learned about Love and romance. I acknowledge I have a lot more to learn.

Love and romance
Love is when your husband is willing to drive the kids to school so you can sleep in, work out, whatever you need to function that day.

Romance is a man willing to get up in the middle of the night to get you an ice pack and whatever else is needed to fight the migraine that suddenly came on. He will rub your neck too even though he is dead tired.

Love is a man who despite his instinct to run when things are bad at work or school or just in general life situations still comes home to help with kids with homework and often help with housework.

Romance is a man who encourages you to have girl time with your friends because he knows how much this helps your stress levels and makes you happier overall. I might add that more traditional romance is often a result of a happier wife.

Love is a man who will just do the laundry when it needs to be done instead of complaining about it.

Romance is that 2-3 times a year when you actually get to go on a date. A matinee movie so you don't have to pay full price followed by a Chipotle picnic at the beach until the kids are all in bed.

Love is putting up with a drastic dietary change to the household and going with out to many complaints to make your wife happy.

Romance is having no money but on Christmas or other holidays your man buying you a cd are small gift he remembered you mentioning from months earlier.

Love is a man who has learned not to fight back or take too seriously the delusional comments and fury from a women in the stages of PMS.

Love is a women who warns her husband  that PMS is on it's way so he can emotionally and mentally prepare for what lies ahead.

Romance is a man who pretends to be interested in his wife's scrapbooks to support her addictions.

Love is a man who is very organized, neat, and tidy, living in a crafty, chaotic, home knowing his wife and kids have enjoyed their crafty adventures.

Love is a man who is patient with his kids and helpful no matter how difficult they may be.

Romance is a man who has to close his eyes to watch medical dramas be willing to peel the dead skin off of your 3rd degree burn.


These are just a few things I have been thinking about. I really feel that so much of our happiness and attitude toward our relationships is simply in our attitude and how we see things. Men think differently then women and when we acknowledge and accept that we will be happier. If you want or need something tell him. Don't assume he should know. That is a petty teenage girl thing to think. If we think differently, then why should we assume that they would see what we need  We are different. Give them credit for what they do do and see the love and romance in their daily actions. One of my favorite quotes is something like the key to a happy marriage is never falling out of love at the same time. I love that. I would add the key to a happy marriage is never falling out of like. Love will come and go but liking the person will sustain a relationship. If you don't like the person a whole lot good sex can sustain things for awhile too!

3 comments:

  1. Love this!! I had no idea this is what love looked like at 20, but somehow I got extremely lucky to find a spouse that shows me love in this way. Love, especially with kids, is selflessly giving of your time!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Very well done. I have never loved Frank more than when I was dead tired taking care of babies and he sat up with me in our mutual misery! It sounds like you got yourself a very good man and I am glad you have each other. Happy Anniversary #17

    ReplyDelete
  3. Beautifully written lady. Truly it takes work each day to recognize, celebrate & cultivate true romance & love. You two are perfect examples of this. Luv you & congrats! xo, trina

    ReplyDelete