Chandlers Prom

If you read my last post you are aware of my current frustration. This week has been particularly difficult for me emotionally. I have so many things to say but after realizing most of them were negative I decided to let them go for now and focus on Chandlers prom.

Chandler attended the LGBTQ prom last year and this year. This is a safe environment for teens in this community and there friends to have a supervised event without fear of ridicule or bullying. This year she was so excited to go. This will be the first time she will have attended a fancy gathering as a female. I did something I never thought I would do. I bought a prom dress and spent hours online trying to find the right pair of shoes. I asked a great photographer Mindy Rainey if she would come take Chandlers pictures before hand. She asked if Chandler would like to have pictures of getting ready to show the whole process. When I asked Chandler she was super excited at the idea. That afternoon she came over to document the process of Chandler presenting the way she feels. She was privileged to watch Chandlers process. No one else is ever allowed in the bathroom while Chandler puts on her face.

The beginning

This Wig head will never leave! 

This is the smile that we had lost for so long. Now that Chandler can be herself we see it so much more.

The tackle box I got her to organize all her stuff in after the crash in the bathroom incident. 

The skills of applying liquid eyeliner.

The face all made up and ready to go. 

Now for the hair!

This is my favorite picture. 

There are a few things I want to point out. Chandlers natural hair. About 2 years ago Chandler shaved her hair short for the first time. We realize now that she was trying to fit into the social stereotypes of what a boy should be. All it did was make her miserable. She is growing it out but it is not long enough for the styles she likes. She has a variety of wigs in many different colors and styles. Many days she is able to fix her hair super cute with a bandanna bow and a clip on pony tail. The only time you will see her like the first picture I posted is just before getting ready. Her hair and makeup will always be done. She is very much into the Betty Paige style and loves vintage clothes and looks. She gets fabulous items at thrift stores all the time.

For anyone who has difficulty understanding, agreeing with, tolerating or accepting transgender people I want to say this. All they want is to have a safe world for them to live the way they feel inside. If you are unwilling to have them in your life the loss is truly yours. Chandler is a great kid who has so much to offer the world. I have learned so much from her. PLEASE don't pass judgment on something you can't possibly understand. Just love. This is not something anyone who has not experienced it first hand can possibly understand.